I can't sit through the Mike Myers Cat in the Hat movie. Just can't, I get to the part when Mike actually shows up, I stop paying attention, I fall asleep, and I don't wake up again until things get really loud and inexplicably colorful. I tried watching it again, same exact thing happened. I can watch the Jim Carrey Grinch film though and I used to think it was weird that I could watch one but not the other until I tried watching an episode of an old kids show I used to love called KaBlam! Same thing, couldn't pay attention, almost fell asleep; but this was a show that I used to watch. Tested Rocko's Modern Life, able to pay attention; that was when I truly learned the difference between kids stuff and family friendly stuff. Thank goodness ParaNorman is "family friendly stuff."
FILM
ParaNorman is about a kid who sees dead people and has to stop them after a witches curse starts bringing them back to life. What's so great about the film is how dark and progressive the humor is, from beginning to end I couldn't stop thinking to myself, "I can't believe they actually said/did that." See, a kids film panders to kids, it'll be filled with humor that only kids will laugh at and plots only a kid would care about. Cat in the Hat is a kids film, KaBlam was a kids show, it's the type of material only a really conservative family would call family friendly. You know the type of family: don't let their kids watch TV and even have parental blocks on their OWN television. Family friendly stuff understands that an adult is watching the film too and so it's structured more around that. Sure, it'll be filled with kids jokes and the likes but it tends to be packed full of more adult related humor. ParaNorman is that kind of film, Rocko's Modern Life is that kind of show. Seriously, I can't watch Rocko's Modern Life the same way I did when I was a kid because I've passed a point of intelligence that allows me to understand adult stuff and let me tell you: Rocko's Modern Life is super perverted and raunchy. ParaNorman isn't along the perverted/raunchy adult humor lines but it is along the dark humor lines as I mentioned, so many jokes are the type of jokes you'd feel bad for saying at a funeral. That's what I love about the film, how awesomely messed up it could be.
VOICE ACTING
It's also a pretty well done stop motion animation film with some pretty good voice acting. In my opinion, good voice acting makes you wonder who voiced the part or makes you think the person chosen to voice the part was perfect for it. Anna Kendrick, Casey Affleck, and even John Goodman fall into that first category. Goodman's character sounded familiar throughout the film but I couldn't quite place who it was until the credits. Jeff Garlin falls into the second category, his voice is fitting as the overweight dad of Norman. Christopher Mintz-Plasse, however, is a terrible voice actor, but that's probably because he has such a recognizable and probably hard to cover up kind of voice.
AUDIENCE
Yup, I've got a comment to say about the audience, it's been a while since I've mentioned them. If you go see the film, be prepared for the possibility of an annoying kid or two. We had one in our audience. Throughout the entire film this little girl with the loudest laugh I've ever heard kept making comments toward the film, the parents shh'ed her though. It also wasn't until everyone was leaving that I noticed it wasn't a little girl at all, it was a boy. Poor kid, voice like that may give him a crappy childhood, although I'd bet money he grows up to have the voice of Morgan Freeman or the movie trailer guy.
FINALLY
I'd say this was a pretty good film. It's good for the whole family. It's also especially good for fans of the horror fiction genre. I didn't mention this in the film paragraph, but the film is packed full of references to classic horror films. I'll give this film a solid B, see it if you get the chance, it's worth the watch.
Friday, August 24, 2012
Saturday, August 18, 2012
Spoiled Milk: The Expendables 2
SPOILER ALERT! The Expendables 2 had some things I didn't understand in it. I'm going to try to make this quick and explain what I found wrong with the film.
1) The hell did everyone go? Schwarzenegger appears at the beginning, then goes away for most of the film and doesn't show up until the end. What was he doing all that time? Li appears at the beginning, then goes away for the rest of the film. Where'd he go? Well, he had to drop this guy off at some location that I can't remember for a reason that I don't believe was actually given. My issue is that he never comes back. Why? Someone kills Liam and that's why that guy couldn't come back, but nobody killed Li, so where did he go? He didn't just call up The Expendables and say, "herro guise, mishun acomprished, come get me."? And don't call me racist for that quote, he literally talks like that in the film.
2) The plutonium. Willis needed it, Van Damme needed it. Why? Basic bomb building stuff I guess.
3) Why didn't they give Charisma Carpenter a bigger part?! They replaced Li with some asian chick, why couldn't that be Carpenter? 'Cause the asian lady is trained to be awesome? Who's to say Charisma's character isn't trained (she is the girlfriend of an Expendable after all)? Also, all the asian lady does is act sexy and shoot stuff, Charisma could just as easily do the same. I'm just really bitter 'cause I'm a fan of Charisma Carpenter and have no clue who Nan Yu is.
So there it is. I'm sure I can think of a lot more specific stuff, but I'll let it slide along with the rest of the stuff I didn't like about the movie. Remember, I do these kind of reviews out of respect, this movie is worth me pointing out at least some of it's flaws, maybe not all of them, but some of them. END SPOILER!
1) The hell did everyone go? Schwarzenegger appears at the beginning, then goes away for most of the film and doesn't show up until the end. What was he doing all that time? Li appears at the beginning, then goes away for the rest of the film. Where'd he go? Well, he had to drop this guy off at some location that I can't remember for a reason that I don't believe was actually given. My issue is that he never comes back. Why? Someone kills Liam and that's why that guy couldn't come back, but nobody killed Li, so where did he go? He didn't just call up The Expendables and say, "herro guise, mishun acomprished, come get me."? And don't call me racist for that quote, he literally talks like that in the film.
2) The plutonium. Willis needed it, Van Damme needed it. Why? Basic bomb building stuff I guess.
3) Why didn't they give Charisma Carpenter a bigger part?! They replaced Li with some asian chick, why couldn't that be Carpenter? 'Cause the asian lady is trained to be awesome? Who's to say Charisma's character isn't trained (she is the girlfriend of an Expendable after all)? Also, all the asian lady does is act sexy and shoot stuff, Charisma could just as easily do the same. I'm just really bitter 'cause I'm a fan of Charisma Carpenter and have no clue who Nan Yu is.
So there it is. I'm sure I can think of a lot more specific stuff, but I'll let it slide along with the rest of the stuff I didn't like about the movie. Remember, I do these kind of reviews out of respect, this movie is worth me pointing out at least some of it's flaws, maybe not all of them, but some of them. END SPOILER!
Movie Review: The Expendables 2
AHHHHHHH!!!! I'm going to rip my shirt off and run around town doing manly stuff like fighting, pillaging, and bear-baiting! This is what has become of me after watching The Expendables 2!
PLOT
Uhhhhhhhhhhhh... hmmmm, there were some guns... oh, and an explosion... something about plutonium... hey Chuck Norris is in this! Yeah, I'm going to lay it out flat for you, this isn't a movie about plot, it's a movie about getting ALL the action stars together in one movie. The first one already did that though, so the second sort of lost part of it's pizazz as far as the all-star cast was concerned. I really liked the beginning and the end, that's where all the awesome action is, everything in between is boring exposition and Chuck Norris. Sure, action movies need a bit of substance to them lest they be senseless, but it's a movie featuring all the greatest action stars of all time, it gets a free pass on sense in my book.
CAST
Couldn't understand a damn person in this film most of the time except Bruce Willis and Liam Hemsworth (aka, the Hemsworth from Hunger Games and not Thor... disappointing much, film?) Naw, but I wanna talk about Hemsworth and Willis along with Schwarzenegger, Van Damme, Norris, and Li. Why not the rest? 'Cause I don't got anything to say about the rest that the first movie didn't already establish.
Hemsworth is way too talented an actor to be in this film and seems to only get bit parts because his brother Chris is more famous. Like I said, he was the only actor I could understand, also the only character I cared about. The rest could live or die and I'd just enjoy the action, but Liam's character actually had depth to him and I respected that.
Willis and Schwarzenegger get bigger parts and they are awesome! If you come to the movie for references to old action films, these guys deliver on that front in the most satisfying of ways.
Van Damme plays an archetypal kills-everyone-he-sees kind of bad guy, but it wasn't a waste of a part for him. He delivers standard action villain stuff. I did spend half the movie wondering if it actually was Van Damme because I had forgetten he had been cast in it, but that's beside the point.
Norris and Li are the most wasted characters in this film. With Li, expect 5min of screen time, then nothing for the rest of the film. With Norris you'll get your obligatory Chuck Norris joke but no roundhouse kicks, take it or leave it. There's also one member of the cast I forgot to mention.
ODE TO CHARISMA CARPENTER
Oh Charisma Carpenter, it is lovely to see you in this film. You were in the last film and I had wondered if you'd be in this one as well. Since Cordelia Chase on Buffy and Angel you haven't done much relevant work. I respect The Expendable films for keeping your career alive. So say I, Casey, the poet.
DIRECTING
Simon West is known for such things as Con Air, Tomb Raider, The Mechanic, and a bunch of Budweiser commercials.... I never thought I'd say this, but, I miss Stallone's directing. The first film had building action and awesomeness, but no real depth. This one had some action and awesomeness and a sad attempt at depth that really didn't go anywhere. Also, some of the scenes were handled wrong, like the Chuck Norris Stuff. First off, it seemed like his part was written for Clint Eastwood (you'll see what I mean). Second, Norris' first scene (the awesome reveal scene) just kind of happens and doesn't really have much kick to it... y'know, like a roundhouse kick! And third, the joke was misplaced, they put it at the very beginning of his scene, if they had put it at the end it would have ended the scene with a good feeling. Instead we get the reveal and joke up front and then Norris just kind of deflates until he's off screen.
AND FINALLY
As awesome as The Expendables 2 was, I kind of liked the first one more. It's not that I expected the sequel to be any better, it's that I had at least expected it to deliver the same thing the first one did. Instead some of the film falls short. That being said, all the bad stuff is worth sitting through for the awesome stuff as well as the humorous stuff. I give this film somewhere between a B- and a C+. Fans of the actors, the explosions, and the guns should go see it if they get the chance, the rest of you can make it a rental. But don't pirate it, the movie (or was it the theater?) warned us not to!
PLOT
Uhhhhhhhhhhhh... hmmmm, there were some guns... oh, and an explosion... something about plutonium... hey Chuck Norris is in this! Yeah, I'm going to lay it out flat for you, this isn't a movie about plot, it's a movie about getting ALL the action stars together in one movie. The first one already did that though, so the second sort of lost part of it's pizazz as far as the all-star cast was concerned. I really liked the beginning and the end, that's where all the awesome action is, everything in between is boring exposition and Chuck Norris. Sure, action movies need a bit of substance to them lest they be senseless, but it's a movie featuring all the greatest action stars of all time, it gets a free pass on sense in my book.
CAST
Couldn't understand a damn person in this film most of the time except Bruce Willis and Liam Hemsworth (aka, the Hemsworth from Hunger Games and not Thor... disappointing much, film?) Naw, but I wanna talk about Hemsworth and Willis along with Schwarzenegger, Van Damme, Norris, and Li. Why not the rest? 'Cause I don't got anything to say about the rest that the first movie didn't already establish.
Hemsworth is way too talented an actor to be in this film and seems to only get bit parts because his brother Chris is more famous. Like I said, he was the only actor I could understand, also the only character I cared about. The rest could live or die and I'd just enjoy the action, but Liam's character actually had depth to him and I respected that.
Willis and Schwarzenegger get bigger parts and they are awesome! If you come to the movie for references to old action films, these guys deliver on that front in the most satisfying of ways.
Van Damme plays an archetypal kills-everyone-he-sees kind of bad guy, but it wasn't a waste of a part for him. He delivers standard action villain stuff. I did spend half the movie wondering if it actually was Van Damme because I had forgetten he had been cast in it, but that's beside the point.
Norris and Li are the most wasted characters in this film. With Li, expect 5min of screen time, then nothing for the rest of the film. With Norris you'll get your obligatory Chuck Norris joke but no roundhouse kicks, take it or leave it. There's also one member of the cast I forgot to mention.
ODE TO CHARISMA CARPENTER
Oh Charisma Carpenter, it is lovely to see you in this film. You were in the last film and I had wondered if you'd be in this one as well. Since Cordelia Chase on Buffy and Angel you haven't done much relevant work. I respect The Expendable films for keeping your career alive. So say I, Casey, the poet.
DIRECTING
Simon West is known for such things as Con Air, Tomb Raider, The Mechanic, and a bunch of Budweiser commercials.... I never thought I'd say this, but, I miss Stallone's directing. The first film had building action and awesomeness, but no real depth. This one had some action and awesomeness and a sad attempt at depth that really didn't go anywhere. Also, some of the scenes were handled wrong, like the Chuck Norris Stuff. First off, it seemed like his part was written for Clint Eastwood (you'll see what I mean). Second, Norris' first scene (the awesome reveal scene) just kind of happens and doesn't really have much kick to it... y'know, like a roundhouse kick! And third, the joke was misplaced, they put it at the very beginning of his scene, if they had put it at the end it would have ended the scene with a good feeling. Instead we get the reveal and joke up front and then Norris just kind of deflates until he's off screen.
AND FINALLY
As awesome as The Expendables 2 was, I kind of liked the first one more. It's not that I expected the sequel to be any better, it's that I had at least expected it to deliver the same thing the first one did. Instead some of the film falls short. That being said, all the bad stuff is worth sitting through for the awesome stuff as well as the humorous stuff. I give this film somewhere between a B- and a C+. Fans of the actors, the explosions, and the guns should go see it if they get the chance, the rest of you can make it a rental. But don't pirate it, the movie (or was it the theater?) warned us not to!
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